I’m an avid creative writer. I have a novel currently being considered for representation by an agent (whom, in turn, I trust completely). I have many, many megabytes of short stories here and there on my drive, possibly 20-30 stories in all. I rarely write about gaming or tech in my creative works, but this one’s a bit different.
Give the fact that I LOVE writing short fiction, I belong to an online writers’ group. The moderator, who goes by the screen monkier “Creole Ned,” gives us ideas upon which we riff to create short stories.
I’ve been lurking this online message board based club for months, but finally submitted my first short story. Ned’s premise?
Exercise 23: Games People Play
Write a scene or story based on a video, board or card game.
Check my entry out and let me know what you think.
Durham on Games 
I don't know very much about Alex Mercer or the game I assume he is a part of, but the story was like a graphic novel — which I have only seen in movies — and I felt sad when Wife died, but I would like to read more chapters because I want to know what happens to the Hero, what if anything his relationship with Alex evolves into, and down the road if he is ever able to find some sort of happiness again. Eternal bleak is not a nice thing to have.
Those are my feelings and this is my critique. Hope it is helpful.
Thanks for the feedback, Jan. This is a one-shot story; for me, it's over and done with. I won't revisit it. I'll let you know when I post my next, unrelated story, though!